ClanTV Comercial Breaks!
by CinderPeltLover
Summary: So, this is what I think a ClanTV commercial break would look like! I'll update every so often, as it is just something I'll do in spare time. RATED KPLUS BECAUSE I'M PARANOID
1. Break1

**_So, This is just what I thought a ClanTV commercial break would look like! I'll make a new one every now and then. Enjoy!_**

* * *

Whitewing is standing in a dentist's office. Owlwhisker walks in. "Let me see your teeth!" She meows. Owlwhisker shows her. She swings her head from side to side. "Oh, Owlwhisker, apparently you don't use _Yellowfang's Mouth Rinse_, do you?"

"No, why?" He asked.

"Because _Yellowfang's Mouth Rinse_ is simply the best! After you brush with _Yellowfang's Toothbrush _and _Yellowfang's Toothpaste_, you swish it in your mouth for only thirty seconds, half the time of the leading brand! Dentists like me use it every night!" Yellowfang pops into the room.

"That's right. My teeth were already horrible by the time I figured out its diverse, complicated formula, it was too late for me. My teeth were damaged beyond repair. But your's aren't! Let's ask some real customers about it!"

The screen now shows a living room with Ferncloud, Dustpelt, and Yellowfang sitting on a sofa. Seven cats are rambling about.

"So, how do you like my mouth rinse?" Yellowfang asked.

"We like it," Ferncloud began, "It's a good tooth cleanser for an affordable price. And the flavors-" Ferncloud was cut off by two she-kits racing into the room.

"I like BlackBerryBlast!" A brown tabby exclaimed.

"I like HoneyMint!" The pale gray kit mewled.

"Hollykit! Larchkit! Stop that at once! Wait-did you eat _all_ of the treats for your preschool class? I told you only one apiece!" Ferncloud exclaimed.

"Maybe," Larchkit squealed mischievously.

"We didn't eat them all! We each ate half!" Hollykit squeaked. Larchkit looked at her.

"Hollykit, I told you not to tell mom!"

"Oops."

"Well, they can clean there teeth with _Yellowfang's Mouth Rinse_!" Yellowfang meowed, clearly trying to wrap up the conversation, "And try the kit's formula, which has a gentle formula just for kits, and it still cleans just as well! Available at Floor-Mart!"

* * *

A stereotypical voice boomed. "Oh, no! Do you have another wasp's nest in the garage? Try_ Bumblestripe's Waspray_! It kills the bugs and clogs up the holes, so say good-bye to those pesky wasps, and get your garage back! And only for 4 mice! That's a bargain! _Shippingratesmayapplycall1-800-234-567formoreinformation_."

* * *

A brute was talking this time. "Want _real_ wings this greenleaf? Head over to _Whitewing's and Nightwing's Wing Shack_! We've got all wings, from super mild to super inferno! From kit's size to LionClan feast! Come on, we're not waiting for you! You'd better come before our greenleaf sales are gone!"

* * *

A very gentle female voice spoke. "Come to _Spottedleaf's MC Academy and University_, where you can learn to be a true medicine cat. It's affordable, and now offered online. Scholarships are also available to qualified cats. We are located in the abandoned twoleg nest, by the old twoleg path. Come now, and let your paws be guided by one of the best medicine cats the Clans have ever seen. You can also call us at 109-543-SMCAU or visit us at ."

* * *

Featherwhisker is in a doctor's office sighing. "Rock, were you sun poisoned again? You know exactly how easily you can get it."

"Well, I didn't know what kind of sunblock to get," Rock explained.

"You should use _Redtail's Sunscreen_."

"Is it better than the others?"

"Oh, yes. Perfect for sensitive skin. You may turn up with a small sunburn, but only a little pink. Nothing to be concerned about."

"Really? So I can go to Midnight's Beach more often?"

"Rock, if you don't start using _Redtail's Sunscreen_, you'll only be able to go to the beach at midnight! Look for _Redtail's Sunscreen_ at Bullseye and Floor-Mart!"

* * *

Well, is it crazy? Funny? Horrible? Let me know!


	2. Break2

_**Wow, 5 reviews overnight?! Thanks! I'll update more**** often!**_

* * *

Smokepaw, a dead ShadowClan apprentice, is standing in front of the gorge with a harness around him. "So, has your family been bored lately? Don't worry, you're not alone. Hey, how about you head over to the gorge and sign up for _Smokepaw's Bungee Dropping_ or _Windflight's Ziplining_? Both are only two mice each round, and we have pavilions where you can sit by the gorge, watching others, and visit a Whitewing's and Nightwing's Wing Hut while you're there. Yeah, we all know it's a wing shack, but it's smaller. Well, what are you waiting for? Let's goooooooooo!" Smokepaw jumps off the gorge.

* * *

A huge rat is scurrying along. "Hey! Do you have a poem you want to submit? Come to , and we'll make your poem into a hit! Don't hesitate! After all, you may have heard what I did to your leader, Firestar. Stupid SkyClan!" The rat leader cursed under his breath about Firestar, and Sandstorm, killing him and his rats.

* * *

Tigerstar is standing with a life-sized Firestar model beside him. "Know someone you absolutely hate? Sure you do! After you've catnapped them and tortured them 'till they've lost the will to live, how about you give them a quick, though painful death? Well, now you can! Order grenades from _Tigerstar's Bomb co._, and that'll be one thing to cross off the evil to-do list: Kill good guy after catnapping them and torturing them 'till they've lost the will to live. And if you order in the next two minutes, shipping will be free! Yup. We want to make killing your arch enemy even more fun, so call this number: 325-666-777. NOW! OR I'LL RELEASE MY BOMBS' FURY ON YOU!"

* * *

"Watch _Goosefeather The Loon_ on channel nine, right after _Stormtail's Weather Forecasts_," Mousewhisker's voice commanded. He's awesome for that kind of thing.

* * *

Applefur is in an apple orchard. "Come to _Applefur's Apple Orchard_! We've got crisp, juicy, sweet apples, and other fruits and supplies, like blackberries, raspberries, honey, and a medicine cat shoppe! Cokme on, before it's too late! We're only open in leaf-fall!"

* * *

Mumblefoot is shown as a young apprentice, walking along the river. Then the scene looks up towards the sky, and then back down. Mumblefoot is now a StarClan cat, and he's watching his Clan flee, and the water in the river getting shallower. He goes to the Thunderpath to see a much larger on being built by twolegs. He looked at the camera, a tear running down his face.

"Care for the environment, like it cares for you."

* * *

"New book! On August twenty-sixth, the newest super edition Bramblestar's Storm is coming!"

* * *

Oakheart spoke. "Come to Oakheart's BBQ! It's all dove, and smoked with-you guessed it! Oak! And check out our skater-servers!"

Mosskit and Mistystar are giving a plate to Raggedstar.

"Aren't they good? And you can't sue us. We give Mosskit a full salary. Come on over!"

* * *

Well, you finished! Was it good again this time? It didn't feel like it, but tell anyway!


	3. Break3

**It's been so long since I've updated - in fact, more than a year. BUT I'M BACK TO IT!**

Lizardstripe is standing in a room with kits running around everywhere. She rolls her eyes and says nothing. Mudclaw comes up to her and looks at the camera.

"This is Lizardstripe's Orphanage! Which I run... her name is just here for commercial purposes."

Lizardstripe sighs. "I hate kits. And all cats. Mudclaw is the cat I hate the least."

Mudclaw gently bumps into his mate. "Come on, not for the commercial! This is so sweet, innocent kits will grow up to become strong, loyal warriors with our help!"

"And that sure worked, didn't it!"

"Oh, come on." Mudclaw picks up a purple she-kit with rainbow eyes. "Isn't this adorable?"

"You know, sometimes I wish you were the Mudclaw that got crushed by a tree!"

The two mates continued bickering and the kit with Mudclaw started a party.

* * *

Fallen Leaves is standing with cats shuffling into the tunnel entrance. He is creating a tour. He doesn't realize the camera is there and is telling tourists about how to get out since they don't have maps, and all the flood and tunnel collapsation warnings. By the end, all of the tourists have run away by the end of the warnings. He then notices the camera.

"Ha, the camera wasn't an accident... ha." He is sweating nervously and covers up the camera with his paw.

* * *

Blossomfall is standing in a large building with ugly portraits of she-cats. One of them, which takes up an entire wall, is an easily recognizable silver tabby. It also has five trophies that are simply cardboard with a thin coating of cheap, peeling golden spraypaint.

Blossomfall jumps in excitement. "This is my museum of worst mothers, founded by me! Opened when Millie became a terrible mother! As you can see," Blossomfall points at the trophies, "she has won the Worst Mothers Contest five years in a row! And spitting on the portraits isn't just allowed; it's recommended! So come on down to loathe all of the worst mothers you and I have ever known!"

* * *

Briarlight is shown with lots of cats all lined up on small mats. Big purple words then come on the screen. They say 'BRIARLIGHT'S YOGA CLASSES. ADJACENT TO THE CLINIC. FOR MORE INFORMATION CALL 111-BRIARLIGHT'

* * *

"Welcome to Hutch's Ice Cream Shoppe! Here we have so many flavors of ice cream you wouldn't believe it! Swing on by, because the weather's supposed to get hot pretty soon!"

**Please review!**


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